I understand you don't want to judge. What I am saying is that Biblically a person can only be born again by the Spirit of God. If you are not born again you do not have the Spirit of God dwelling in you. If you have the Spirit of God dwelling in you you are saved. That is, you belong to God and Christ.
Romans 8:9 NASB - 9 However, you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. But if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Him.
If you don't know, you should test yourself.
2 Corinthians 13:5 NASB - 5 Test yourselves to see if you are in the faith; examine yourselves! Or do you not recognize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you--unless indeed you fail the test?