Then you have other emotional issues that need dealt with that have nothing to do with forgiveness.
Too bad I don't go to any therapist... I could quit now as it's free here
I'd wager you don't actually forgive many of the people you think you forgive because you still expect those people to answer to God. And that's all I'm suggesting. There is no need to "hold a grudge" where the offender lives rent free in your mind 24/7 and where you eventually become embittered and angry.
I'm not sure where you're taking these ideas from. Biblical forgiveness is absolute, total, without yelling, "God will get you for that.". It's Acts 7:60... I love the passage where the angel touches Isaiah with a coal and says your sin is forgiven... that much it took... and it was during the Mosaic covenant...
The biblical teaching is that vengeance belongs to God and we aught to look forward to that vengeance.
Please check the actual meaning of the terms used in the Bible for 'vengeance.' Justice doesn't necessarily mean to punish the wicked ones.
I do not want to be held responsible for all bad things I did - and thank God I'm not - why would I want it for others?
Well someone's going to be!
I don't think so. I think real forgiveness wipes the slate clean.
If someone has wronged you, don't let their offense further harm you by becoming bitter.
When someone wrongs me, I quote Ephesians 4:32 in my head.
I don't expect my bad deeds to be punished by God and I want the same for others.
And you aught to want it for others for the reason Paul describes in I Corinthians...
(cut)
that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
I encourage you to spend some time and research what the reason is that most of translations have the words
"his" added in 1 Corinthians 5:5 even though that word is
not in Greek.
Also, can you answer the question, how is the "salvation of spirit" different than "salvation of soul?"
You want to be nicer than God is!
If God is love, I believe He will not smack me for that very hard
Of course. But I hear that all the time from people having totally opposite ideas. I think a little humility is due here. Bible is a very difficult book.
I rest my case...
Most of us would find it impossible to fully understand something in English written a few hundred years ago and you claim something written in long dead languages, thousands of years ago, is not difficult?
And on top of all problems with language, there's a huge lobby of monster sized denominations, which get billions of dollars by forcing their interpretation of Bible verses sink deeply into people's minds, and they are so omnipresent that hardly anyone knows today what the Bible originally meant... and just you say... no it isn't.
I'm not saying I'm better than you and my truth is better than yours. I'm trying to be open to hew horizons and I want to be open to learning from you... I just believe you either trusted your priest/pastor too much or that you think you know way more than you actually do. Humility is a virtue really encouraged in the Bible, isn't it?
I was in quite a few Christian denominations, including the largest ones of the world, and in the beginning I was always happy that I finally found what I was looking for. But after the initial emotional WOW passed, I realized I still could not find full peace. And some verses of the Bible never made sense, whether I was in a traditional or protestant Church. There were just different verses here and there...
I couldn't find peace not only within myself, but I didn't see it in other members of the churches... and pastors... how come they say God is peace and they know Him intimately and they yell at their kids and wives for no reason?
How come they say they have absolute peace but start shaking when someone has different beliefs? Or... when someone takes the parking spot you hoped for?
In all denominations there were people who seemed to have peace ... perhaps 1 in a 100... and I started wondering - why doesn't anyone speak about this hypocrisy? Peace on lips only?
After some time, usually years, I was finding out there's so much bologna there... I realized that religion makes money only when they lie.
Let's assume, hypothetically, that you're a pastor of a 10K people church and you learn from the Bible one day there's no punishment of any kind from God, ever. You become a full universalist. Would you tell that to your congregation, where you get your 7 figure salary from?
Half the people would leave you because you'd be a heretic in their eyes, the other half would leave because God will forgive them anyway even if they do picnics on Sunday rather than church.
Truth seldom makes you rich.
Ask yourself if the theology you believe now gives you full peace, and can everyone you hang out with can confirm it.