Why men won't marry you

[1PeaceMaker]

I haven't discussed anything with you via PM. I have no issues with women. I have issues with misandrists like yourself. I'm sorry to hear Vol had issues though... I doubt he really had women issues. Sounds to me like he just lacked confidence in himself.

Voltaire was honest to me about who he was when he switched users. That, and the fact that you are younger, not a dispensationalist or even a Christian....

Occam's razor, people. Men don't just switch religions, age and personalities to torment paranoid old women.

 

[1PeaceMaker]

Some women don't mind that their husband is less "smart" than she is.

And that attitude can lead to divorce, just ask Rusha.

 

[elohiym]

Is publicly trashing a spouse emotional abuse?

A4T said yes after she publicly tried to trash (abuse) you. If Rusha agrees with her then she is guilty of the same abuse towards you.

 

[1PeaceMaker]

Her assessment is based on research and the fact she is a woman (unlike you, dude lecturing her on what women want). .....

She was speaking from experience that is supported by research, so it's you that's making silly statements.

Great post, BTW. I don't even have to respond, with you dispatching his fallacies so neatly. Thank you!

To recap, I think you are smarter than me because with your common sense you catch mistakes and solve or prevent problems faster than I do on average IRL and also win arguments fair and square more often than not. That's very manly and attractive to me. In parenting, it's an invaluable asset.

I'm pretty sure most women agree that's very becoming on a man.

Not highly valuing common sense/wisdom/intelligence is a foolish mistake in choosing a mate for marriage.

 

[1PeaceMaker]

A4T said yes after she publicly tried to trash (abuse) you. If Rusha agrees with her then she is guilty of the same abuse towards you.

That's why she's running from the questions. She needs to move on from what ruined her happiness to begin with.

 

[Arthur Brain]

The claim was most women, not all women, want to marry a man who is more intelligent than they are. That claim is supported by research. For example, the main thing most women look for is financial stability (does he have a job). Income is generally dependant on intelligence. Does he work in the medical field or serving tacos? That matters to most women.



Do most women look for intelligent men? If most look for financial stability it follows that most look for intelligence because it effects income, as do attractiveness and confidence.

Women look for those traits just like employers do.

You are in absolutely no position to dictate that most women want a smarter mate, none whatsoever. Get over yourself Elo. You, like Yorzhik are not spokespersons for women in general.

 

[Arthur Brain]

Stop picking on ArthurBrain/Red77.

She wasn't. I made no bones about coming clean with my AB username after I was banned as red77, partly after confronting serpentdove with her ridiculous accusations in her signature. I even said to Knight in the thread I started I'd take a ban because I had in effect snuck back in before my ban as red77 was due to expire, so keep pulling that stunt if you want.

 

[Town Heretic]

Scoff if you wish.

:mock:

Call me a fuddy-duddy

Fuddy-duddy.

But how’s that new plan working out?

I'm not sure. Maybe the people who aren't marrying these days were the sort of people who would have divorced in no time flat earlier, given they were marrying for the wrong reasons, an immature emotional attachment coupled with a desire to couple. Divorces rates climbed to an unprecedented high in the 70s and 80s but have dropped over the past 20 years. The Divorce Surge is Over, New York Times, Dec. 2014

Those married in the 60s had an average divorce rate of around 34%.
Those married in the 70s had an average divorce rate of around 45%.
Those married in the 80s had an average divorce rate of around 50%.

But those married in 2000s? Much, much lower. The trend is to the good. Why? Possibly because people are marrying later and making more mature decisions. Partly because some of those who married for the wrong reasons aren't bothering, which is still better for the institution.

Unlike women, men lose all power after they say “I do.” Their masculinity dies, too.

That's the craziest thing I've hear since someone suggested it would be a good idea if we had lunch at a gas station.

Today’s sitcoms and commercials routinely paint a portrait of the idiot husband whose wife is smarter and more capable than he.

Well, that's true and irksome. My wife was the first person I knew that noticed it.

There was a time when wives respected their husbands. There was a time when wives took care of their husbands as they expected their husbands to take care of them.

I think they mostly did and mostly do. I don't see that as the problem. And given the way marriage length is trending I'm not sure there really is a problem.

In the past, Mom got the kids because she was home with them doing the thankless, unpaid, mountainous work associated with that role. Today, neither parent is home, so there’s no reason the default custodial parent should be Mom.

And today there's no presumption at law in favor of mom. That's been struck.

So remind me, why would a man marry today?

Because he desires to love, honor and cherish and to be loved, honored and cherished. Same as it ever was.

 

[Rusha]

She wasn't. I made no bones about coming clean with my AB username after I was banned as red77, partly after confronting serpentdove with her ridiculous accusations in her signature. I even said to Knight in the thread I started I'd take a ban because I had in effect snuck back in before my ban as red77 was due to expire, so keep pulling that stunt if you want.

And THERE is the difference. You are honest enough to admit both ID's belong to you. Then there is the fact that you were not permabanned under three previous ID's for harassment and stalking.

 

[CabinetMaker]

Her assessment is based on research and the fact she is a woman (unlike you, dude lecturing her on what women want).



No, most women want a man who is gentle and kind.



No, research has shown most women prefer a masculine looking men when they are ovulating. Furthermore, research has shown preference for a masculine partner correlates with social and environmental factors such as quality of health care in their country.



No, most women want a man who will be the strong leader.



Most women can't have it all. The most beautiful women (according to research) want it all, and they do not want a man less intelligent.



Thank you, Captain Obvious.



She was speaking from experience that is supported by research, so it's you that's making silly statements.

The point was that woman value different traits differently. We all want everything but; some women prefer intelligence over looks. Other woman prefer strength over intelligence. Apparently I wasn't obvious enough for you to understand that.

 

[CabinetMaker]

And that attitude can lead to divorce, just ask Rusha.

So it us your conclusion that men of "lessor" intelligence become a users and have affairs. Do woman of "lessor" intelligence also become abusive and seek out affairs?

 

[Rusha]

And that attitude can lead to divorce, just ask Rusha.

Oh ... will you discussing what attitude lead to divorce in your husband's first marriage?

 

[Arthur Brain]

Great post, BTW. I don't even have to respond, with you dispatching his fallacies so neatly. Thank you!

To recap, I think you are smarter than me because with your common sense you catch mistakes and solve or prevent problems faster than I do on average IRL and also win arguments fair and square more often than not. That's very manly and attractive to me. In parenting, it's an invaluable asset.

I'm pretty sure most women agree that's very becoming on a man.

Not highly valuing common sense/wisdom/intelligence is a foolish mistake in choosing a mate for marriage.

It's isn't a question of not valuing common sense/wisdom/intelligence in a partner. It's the arrogant and unsupported assumption that most women desire a partner who possess more of those attributes than they themselves.

 

[glorydaz]

Sex, marriage, dating, and family life. Elohiym turned over too many cherished notions of a4t revarding these areas of life on their heads and this inspired a blinding white heat of hatred in her. She had bad experiences with men in her life and she transfers their character onto him because some feminist convinced her that these men acted that way because of the attitudes towards the areas of life I mention at the start of this post. This is how she is so sure Elohim is abusive that she would bet her life on it.

Hi Mrs. Elohiym....welcome back. :chuckle:

 

[glorydaz]

Her assessment is based on research and the fact she is a woman (unlike you, dude lecturing her on what women want).



No, most women want a man who is gentle and kind.



No, research has shown most women prefer a masculine looking men when they are ovulating. Furthermore, research has shown preference for a masculine partner correlates with social and environmental factors such as quality of health care in their country.



No, most women want a man who will be the strong leader.



Most women can't have it all. The most beautiful women (according to research) want it all, and they do not want a man less intelligent.



Thank you, Captain Obvious.



She was speaking from experience that is supported by research, so it's you that's making silly statements.

How many women do you have, and are they all women? Just curious. You aren't Mormon are you....by any chance?

 

[1PeaceMaker]

How many women do you have, and are they all women?

He has one wife and 4 daughters. I'm the wife and the only adult woman in the house for now.

 

[elohiym]

Procreation, fatherhood and husbandry are integral to the commission and there is no commission without human procreation. There is no greater purpose for man and no greater work of God than procreation.

I think you erred in your conclusion. You don't have to care about the commission to procreate.

That's not my conclusion. There is no commission without human procreation is my conclusion, and therefore no greater purpose and no greater work.

It only receives value as a means to a greater end.

I disagree. A new born baby and a saved adult have the same value to our Father. The prodigal son was as valuable before he left home as he was when he returned, and the gospel was just a means of getting him to come home. I believe the quintessential value is in being God's child, which means every person has equal value as siblings (Mt 23:9; Acts 17:28-20).

The greatest work therefore is the commission and procreation is only necessary for some.

The greater works are necessarily something other than the commission because Jesus participated in the commission and did those works but said those who followed him would do greater works than he did (Jn 14:12). He didn't have children.

Paul in particular seems clear that it can be an advantage for some to abstain altogether.

I understand Paul to be speaking about the time of persecution he lived in. Believers were persecuted by Romans and unbelieving Jews. His words make sense for that time for the specific audiences he was addressing. He would have erred to generally contradict the first command to be fruitful and multiply, and many brothers and sisters, some who became preachers dedicated to the commission, would not have been born it seems.

Happy Father's Day! :cheers:

 

[elohiym]

Oh ... will you discussing what attitude lead to divorce in your husband's first marriage?

We were not intellectually compatible.

 

[serpentdove]

"Scoff if you wish." :mock:

You are quoting the article.

 

[elohiym]

So it us your conclusion that men of "lessor" intelligence become a users and have affairs.

No. Research correlates those behaviors with higher testosterone levels. In one study men with testosterone levels one standard deviation above mean were 43% more likely to divorce. There is evidence linking gifted levels of intelligence to prenatal exposure to higher levels of testosterone, which also increases connections in the right pre-frontal cortex. So the highly intelligent man whose pre-frontal cortex matured faster than normal actually has a greater chance of being divorced, engaging infidelity and being abusive.