Bull.Originally posted by Gerald
No, the divorce rate was lower because in those days getting divorced was usually a sentence to death by starvation or exposure.
Bull.Originally posted by Gerald
No, the divorce rate was lower because in those days getting divorced was usually a sentence to death by starvation or exposure.
Well, at least you're somewhat intelligent.Originally posted by Gerald
It certainly creates more problems than it solves, and is best avoided.
Of course, not all folks on the dating scene have that much foresight..
Originally posted by lighthouse
You're a complete dumbass. I know my best friend pretty well, and I've spent time alone with him. Those times were obviously not dates. I can get to know someone and spend time alone with them, without it being a date.
What amuses me is that you never use the term "boyfriend."
And I am even more amused by the fact that you will most likely never refer to him as your "fiancé," or your "husband."
And what does "partner" mean anyway? Sexual partner? Life partner?
Also, using the term "partner" to refer to your boy/girlfriend was started by homos, because they couldn't get married. By calling him your "partner" you are affirming the notion that you do not intend to marry him.
If you are using it because he is your sexual partner, this affirms the notion that you do not intend to marry, and reduces him to nothing more than a sex toy.
2] I do not see the point in being in a relationship that you don't think is going to go anywhere. And especially not in intentionally not moving forward with it. That is the only reason I'm against "dating." It is the only form of "dating" I am against."
Why not?
Or is it more like, why should he? He is getting what he wants right now, without any real commitment.
So you performed sexual acts for free?
Until something better comes along.
Maybe now you can go out and find someone to shack up with and never get married at all.
Firechyld seems happy with her situation.
Spend time with them in a group setting. Couples don't have to be alone to get to know each other.
Having sex right away (dating in the 00's) is not getting to know them, unless sex is all you are after.
A man and a woman who are attracted to each other and who spend a lot of time alone with each other. Hello?
Wow, you have a really broken view of marriage there, Shimei. It seems in your world, men only get married so they can have sex with their partners, and the women better hold out or they won't be able to forcing their partner into doing something they don't want.
What is wrong with you?! How stupid can one person be?! I never said that date=sex! I said that I can get to know a person without dating them, idiot! And I can. I don't need to date to get to know someone!:doh:Originally posted by granite1010
Well of course, half-wit: my best friend happens to be a guy, don't know about you, but a date was unnecessary to get to know him. So at least you're willing to admit that people can spend time alone together and get to know each other? How is this NOT a date? Maybe your definition differs from mine. You and Shimei seem so obsessed with sex (perhaps because you're not getting it) that you seem to equate the word "date" with "sex."
Originally posted by lighthouse
What is wrong with you?! How stupid can one person be?! I never said that date=sex! I said that I can get to know a person without dating them, idiot! And I can. I don't need to date to get to know someone!:doh:
I don't believe you.Originally posted by firechyld
lighthouse:
*shrug* I do sometimes. But he's more than a "boyfriend".
He's nothing more than a security blanket for you. You use him to make yourself feel like you're worth something, because he makes you feel good.Bear in mind that this might be something as simple as Australian vs American idiom. Most people i know who are in serious relationships refer to their significant other as their "partner". We both used the term to refer to our (now ex) fiance/es.
You've already said that you don't want to marry him.What on earth are you basing that on?
He's not a "life" partner, until you've committed to spend the rest of your life with him. And you haven't.All of the above? He's the person who walks beside me, and shares my life. My partner. I guess I use it almost in terms of a dance partner.
You've already said that you don't want to marry him.No, I'm not. That's just what you're reading into it.
You've already said that you don't want to marry him. And the statement stands, if all you mean is "sex partner," then that reduces him to nothing morethan a sex toy. I never said that "sex partner" is all you mean.Once again, you profess knowledge of something you know nothing about. One day you'll figure out that relationships are a lot more complex than you think.
You're kidding, right? I'd prefer not to "date" someone that I don't want to actually be with. That's all. And I never said anythign about a destination. I do not need a girlfriend to feel better about myself, or to elevate myself to some societal status. When I'm ready to get married, it will be after I've found someone I want to sepnd the rest of my life with, and I will pursue a relationship, with the intetntion of marriage. I will wait until I find someone who feels the same way, and we will move forward with it. And the marriage will not be some imaginary destination, it will be the continuation of the journey.There's something else that I hope you'll one day realise. A relationship isn't about a destination... it's about a journey. Your insistance that a relationship has to be "going somewhere" is simplistic... all relationships go somewhere. They go into the future.
You're not moving forward. you're staying in the same place. Neither of you seems to have decided that you want to move forward. And the most likely scenario is that instead of moving forward, you'll move apart.We're happy with where we are now, and we're happy with how we're moving forward. Neither of us can possibly know what the future holds. Wherever we're going, we'll get there together. That's the important thing.
You sound like Bill Clinton. Sexual act does not = sexual intercourse.:doh:*grin* In my personal life, if I wanted to sleep with someone, yes. But my professional life has never involved sexual intercourse for money.
I do believe you are dumber than a box of hammers. Nothing I have ever said indicates that dating=sex. I know people who date without sex. I just don't see the point in dating to get to know someone when it is obviously unnecessary.Originally posted by granite1010
:yawn:
The blizzard boy doth protest too much, me thinks.
Both you and Shimei SEEM to think it's impossible for people to date without having sex. Now, if you want to clarify, go right on ahead. We'd both agree--now, apparently--that you can get to know someone without dating them, but that wasn't my point. You and Shimei seem positively paranoid about every single date out there degenerating into sex (oh, heavens, what IS this world coming to).
Originally posted by lighthouse
I do believe you are dumber than a box of hammers. Nothing I have ever said indicates that dating=sex. I know people who date without sex. I just don't see the point in dating to get to know someone when it is obviously unnecessary.
I'm smarter than you.Originally posted by granite1010
Look who's talking: I didn't know that minimum wage slaves who slobbed behind a DQ counter could be counted on to quantify someone's intelligence.
Like I said, I've gone to movies with my friends. That's not a date. It's not a date unless it's specified as a date. moron.But I digress...Brandon, how exactly would you define a "date"? Spending time with somebody, one-on-one, and getting to know them is a "date." Go out somewhere, movie, park, bowling alley, football game, what have you. You are on a "date," at least as I understand the word. Maybe our definitions aren't exactly the same. I'd like to know yours.
Your definition of date is flawed, dumbass. I can go to a movies with someone I'm interested in without it being a date. Even if it is just the two of us, and we are both interested in each other.What would you call such activities? And how do you propose people get to know one another if dating is so "obviously" unnecessary? Shimei's Group Date idea is a little absurd: adults don't need chaperones.
I've never been on anything specifically specified as a date.P.S. When did YOU actually go out, or have you been under your rock longer than you'd like to admit?
I'm not bragging. You're just an idiot. I'm not. Pointing it out to you isn't bragging. You don't see me trying to tell someone else that I'm smarter than you, do you?Originally posted by granite1010
"I'm smarter than you.
:darwinsm:
Sorry, sorry, that was just priceless. Hint: those who have brains don't need to brag about it, nor do they need to prove it on a bulletin board. Get a life, my man.
Both male and female. I don't date guys, obviously. And that leads into my point. When I go to a movie with a guy friend, it isn't a date. And when I go to a movie with a female friend, it isn't a date. Is it really that hard for you to comprehend?"Like I said, I've gone to movies with my friends. That's not a date. It's not a date unless it's specified as a date."
FEMALE friends, I assume. (You've been very gender-vague. Coincidence?) What do you call it? "Going somewhere"? "Going out"? If not a date, what? Do you really need to spell it out? "Hey, let's go have dinner, see a movie, and spend time alone. But LEMME BE SPECIFIC: THIS IS NOT A DATE IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM."
You really are stupid.Uh-huuuuh. If it looks like a date, feels like a date--aw, forget it.
If I don't ask her on a date, but I ask her to see a movie, it isn't a date. I went to see The Incredibles with a female friend of mine. I'm interested in her. It wasn't a date."I can go to a movies with someone I'm interested in without it being a date. Even if it is just the two of us, and we are both interested in each other."
Again: what's this called? Brandon, the only person who doesn't know he's on a date is YOU. And if you're so interested in this person--guy? gal? you tell me--maybe you should actually let them know. I mean, jeez oh pete. Grow up. Grow SOMETHING, anyway.
I never said I've never had a girlfriend, did I? I've just never been on anything specified as a date. I tried to once, and a "friend" attempted to ruin it, by lying to the girl. And because she thought he was telling the truth, by the time I explained to her the truth it was too late. If you want an explanation, I'll give it, but I don't think it's necessary."I've never been on anything specifically specified as a date."
And this, my nominally employed Christ-loving friend, is very sad commentary.
Love has to be a factor. Are you incapable of paying attention? Lust is the antithesis of love, and should not be a factor in marriage.Originally posted by Gerald
Perhaps an arranged marriage would be more agreeable to lighthouse's sensibilities.
That way, love/chemistry/attraction/lust/etc. is not a factor.
That depends on what you want the marriage to work for.Originally posted by lighthouse
Anyway, I am against arranged marriages in that order. Love must exist for a marriage to work.
An idiot is an idiot. Whether I say it or not. Anyway, why aren't you outside watching for the comet?Originally posted by OMEGA
So far , lighthouse has called his fellow posters
IDIOT MORON STUPID
I think that this is Offencive and Not a sign of a Mature Person.
Because being a pain to you is more fun...?Originally posted by lighthouse
An idiot is an idiot. Whether I say it or not. Anyway, why aren't you outside watching for the comet?