I'm not complaining, I'm just in the process of writing my Autobiography and running it by you, for any helpful critique that may enhance interest in my story.
FEELING ONE'S AGE
- Thread starter Grosnick Marowbe
- Start date
Does anybody out there in "TOL Land" have any 'helpful opinions' on how to grow old with dignity? I don't wish to turn into one of those, elderly folks who spend their time "griping about their ailments." Although, I'm one of those, elderly folks that spend their time "griping about their 'myriad' of ailments."
The other day an "elderly Lady" offered to help me cross the street. That was humiliating, to say the least.
Here's a bit of irony; a Teenager demanded I "get off his lawn" the other day. Isn't it supposed to be the other way around?
Ask Mr. Religion
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Good to see you here and about, brother.
Highly recommended to set aside the ennui that often accompanies our entrance into the final stages of our walk of faith:
https://www.amazon.com/Ten-Rules-Growing-Older-Dignity-ebook/dp/B00AWWMSQA/
Ten Rules
FOR GROWING OLDER WITH DIGNITY
A Christian Perspective
Author: Richard H. Cox, MD PhD DMin
The author discusses a great deal of medical, personal, and spiritual matters from his perspective as a medical doctor and a Christian. You will find it edifying.
Some teasers...
Rule One: Admit It
Aging is inevitable. Aging does not seek our consent. Aging is natural. Aging is proof of durability. Aging is evidence of experience, an attribute only obtained by experience- it cannot be taught. Aging is a gift. Aging is valuable and priceless. Embrace it, be grateful for it, share it, and enjoy it.
Rule Two: Deny It
Although we cannot deny the existence of aging, we can deny the aspects of aging that bring us down. We can rob aging of the power it has over us. It is in this ability to exert our choice over the negative aspects of aging that we also find the freedom to live along with the purpose for living.
Rule Three: Refuse Imitation
Imitation is often the "immediacy of the moment," but turns into habits that stay with us for life. Only conscious refusal to succumb to the subtleties of debilitating thoughts, feelings, and behaviors will help. Dare to be different in a positive manner!
Rule Four: Intentionality: Doing Everything on Purpose with Purpose
Peronal spirituality is not only discovery of the self, but doing something about what you find out, then practice "being good" until it becomes a habit so engrained that happiness and hope are not lost in the face of crises or diminished capacity.
Rule Five: The Rule of Hope
Hope is not free. Hope is very expensive - it requires submission of all doubts to a much greater power, i.e., "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Rule Six: In the Short Run You Lose!
"Losing" is nothing more than recognizing that we have been in the process of losing physical and/or mental function for many years and existing under a delusion that we are somehow in control. Yes, in the short run we lose - particularly if we are not vigilant. This is not actually losing, however, since the "loss" has already occurred (loss of physical and/or mental function, person, etc). What is discussed here is the concept of grief and suffering. Although we typically think of suffering as a negative term, there are positive benefits if we allow ourselves to be open and willing to see them. For example, suffering can bring about creativity, resourcefulness and courage as David did when he was stranded in the wilderness (Psalm 63). Sometimes it takes pain and suffering to turn a person's life around and head it in the right direction as Paul experienced when he was converted from persecutor to disciple (Acts 9:1-16). Perhaps we are forced to turn to God because we have no other place to turn, thus our trust in Him is either created or strengthened. (Job 42:2-3). Sometimes, pain and suffering can stop us from becoming arrogant (II Corinthians 12:7-10). Handling pain and suffering with God's grace can serve as an inspiration to others to do the same as when Paul was imprisoned (Philippians 1:12-14).
Rule Seven: In the Long Run You Win!
That which was initially considered a loss is seen only as a loss if a terrestrial and materialistic value is placed upon it. Losses are often gains misinterpreted and vice versa.
Rule Eight: Capitalize on Change
Change can be good. Change can bring opportunities. Change can open new doors. Change can invigorate the mind and body. Change can jump-start your life. Life is a journey of change from cradle to grave. There is nothing unique about change in aging. By the time we reach that point we are well schooled in dealing with change. The difference, however, is noticeable when experiencing change in old age versus change at a younger age. What is the difference? With age comes a sense of absoluteness and potential for not being able to live long enough to reverse any decision made. Therefore change appears (and often is) more permanent. Change requires greater effort for intentional involvement rather than simply "allowing it to happen."
Rule Nine: Repair and Renovation: Tearing Down Fences, Building Bridges
Tearing down fences does not mean giving up what you believe and does not destroy boundaries; it simply allows visibility and openness to both sides.
Rule Ten: It's Not Too Late - You've Already Started
For those who are now in the "senior citizen category" it is far from too late to enter into an active, even exciting, plan for their own later years.
AMR
musterion
Well-known member
I didn't realize it as such at the time but I recently realized that after many teen years of utter agony, I came to pride myself on having been relatively underweight my whole life (slim would be putting it nicely) and because of that, looking healthy enough. Being a late bloomer, I also aged rather slowly. Slowly enough so that it often was commented on even into my 40s.
Now that I'll be 50 next fall, and having been diagnosed with or experienced Hashimoto's, an Alzheimer's false alarm, MTHFR double mutation (look it up), a kidney stone, an odd heartbeat every now and then, up-creeping blood sugar, increasing creaks, cracks, pains, a waistline that wants to annex more territory, and graying, thinning hair, I'm proud to say all of this has been rather humbling.
I take that back. Bad joke.
Seriously, this has been a humbling several years as I've finally been forced to begin to face mortality. Yeah, it happens to everyone sooner or later but it really has lent a perspective on the temporal vs eternal that I did not have before. Now I do, and at the moment, the thought of death does not frighten me, and I'm still willing to try this whole young at heart thing even though the man in the mirror grows more unrecognizable all the time. He has hairs growing out of the tops of his ears, for crying out loud.
Now that I'll be 50 next fall, and having been diagnosed with or experienced Hashimoto's, an Alzheimer's false alarm, MTHFR double mutation (look it up), a kidney stone, an odd heartbeat every now and then, up-creeping blood sugar, increasing creaks, cracks, pains, a waistline that wants to annex more territory, and graying, thinning hair, I'm proud to say all of this has been rather humbling.
I take that back. Bad joke.
Seriously, this has been a humbling several years as I've finally been forced to begin to face mortality. Yeah, it happens to everyone sooner or later but it really has lent a perspective on the temporal vs eternal that I did not have before. Now I do, and at the moment, the thought of death does not frighten me, and I'm still willing to try this whole young at heart thing even though the man in the mirror grows more unrecognizable all the time. He has hairs growing out of the tops of his ears, for crying out loud.
That's too many rules.
How many are there for growing old without dignity?
hehe!
glorydaz
Well-known member
Ha, my cousin used to say, "These Golden Years aren't so Golden after all."
glorydaz
Well-known member
I can relate. I'll be 49 in 2 months and I see life in stages now, each one seemingly shorter than the last. It begins to sink in how little time we have here and I think more of heavenly things. I always have, more so than others but even more the older I get. I am at peace with death for the most part but I pray for minimal suffering. I have some medical issues but I am blessed compared to so many people.
Sometimes I think about the short time we have and how a small group of people converged on TOL for periods of our life. I'm fond of everyone here, each in a different way, and even though I don't always show it, I love you all. I suppose I'll always log in here if it's up and running.
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Ask Mr. Religion
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I can resonate with the creeping age and all that it brings. I will be 65 this February and finally a Medicare recipient. Have a left main coronary artery that is 69% blocked and my caridiologist is frustrated by my refusal for a bypass. So I regularly have to intake oxygen to avoid fluid build up in my lungs compounding a heart failure diagnosis. Add to that psoriatic arthritis since age 36 that has debilitated me to the point that I can barely use a computer mouse or walk any real distances without agony. So each new year for me is a gift, knowing the end is near and my call home to glory but a whisper away, per the will of God. I believe I have run the good race and fought the good fight, and welcome what is in store for me. Indeed, on late and lonely nights like this one, I even yearn for this.
My wife of 36 years has been bed-ridden with physical and mental disorders for over 13 years now. I am her primary care-giver and must be near her bedside 24/7. My son helps watch over his Mother when I must run errands, cook, or other chores. She is often overcome with psychoses; fighting imagined demons. I spend most of my days toiling away at a small table near her bed so I can look over her. Occasionally, that pretty girl who once annoyed me to no end by talking to me uninvited (the nerve!) while waiting in line at the Haunted Mansion at Disneyland (when we first met) returns to me for a few precious moments of lucidity. There you are, I say, to the woman who makes me want to be a better man every day. Thanks be to God for sharing in His abundance daily.
So when a couple of months have passed and AMR seems absent from TOL and my other internet haunts, you will know that he is now present with the Lord and explaining to all the open theists and Arminians in Heaven how exactly they came to be there. :AMR:
AMR
My wife of 36 years has been bed-ridden with physical and mental disorders for over 13 years now. I am her primary care-giver and must be near her bedside 24/7. My son helps watch over his Mother when I must run errands, cook, or other chores. She is often overcome with psychoses; fighting imagined demons. I spend most of my days toiling away at a small table near her bed so I can look over her. Occasionally, that pretty girl who once annoyed me to no end by talking to me uninvited (the nerve!) while waiting in line at the Haunted Mansion at Disneyland (when we first met) returns to me for a few precious moments of lucidity. There you are, I say, to the woman who makes me want to be a better man every day. Thanks be to God for sharing in His abundance daily.
So when a couple of months have passed and AMR seems absent from TOL and my other internet haunts, you will know that he is now present with the Lord and explaining to all the open theists and Arminians in Heaven how exactly they came to be there. :AMR:
AMR
musterion
Well-known member
AMR, I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I'll add you to my prayer list. I hope you might reconsider having that blockage taken care of. A good friend of mine had two or three stents put in one of his Arteries and appears to be doing fine. He's about 72 years old. I sincerely hope that you might consider having it done.
That's funny Tam.
It appears that a lot of older people have a problem with indigestion. One old guy stated; "My indigestion was so bad that my "Tapeworm" committed suicide by consuming, itself."
Right Divider
Body part
I thought I was one of the older folks here (61 a couple of months ago), until this thread. :wave2:
I'm still in pretty good health, but definitely feeling time taking its toll. A couple of pills every morning....
My wife is about a year younger than me and has a few minor issues as well. We will celebrate our 40th anniversary next summer, God willing.
I'm still in pretty good health, but definitely feeling time taking its toll. A couple of pills every morning....
My wife is about a year younger than me and has a few minor issues as well. We will celebrate our 40th anniversary next summer, God willing.
I'm older than you, but younger than GM.
And yeah, things like aspirin and Ben-Gay become your close friends.
Forty years of Marriage huh? Good for you. Congratulations.