Do You Like Yourself?

B

bybee

New member
chrysostom said:
good topic
but
I wonder who will be honest about this

regrets I have a few
but
I won't mention them

I played it safe
maybe I should have taken more chances
I have often wondered about that guy who buried his one talent
I hope that is not me
I am comfortable, maybe too comfortable
one wife, two kids, and three grandchildren
I see many with more of everything
but
don't really think I deserve what I have
I am happy with myself
but
do think I could have done better, much better
but
it is not over yet
so
I will keep trying
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Ah Chrys, you are a challenging voice here on TOL. You offer people thought provoking topics and you share some of your rationales.
I'm glad that you are here and that you have made it your business to befriend and welcome those who need it most.
I think you are doing a great job.
 
A

aikido7

BANNED
Banned
bybee said:
I ask because I have spent a good amount of my time on this earth not liking myself. I was not aware that I did not like myself until I began to question my judgementalism.
I rarely received a compliment from my parents and they were hyper critical of any of my efforts. Trying to please and falling short set a pattern of internal negative thinking.
This is something on which I work to change.

What about you?
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I can sure relate to your experiences and I celebrate your progress to "get above and beyond" such things. For me it involved actually remembering/feeling those experiences as an adult, paying close attention to that little guy in the past and how he was feeling then.
By offering that innocent child the attention and healing he was denied I was able to finally have a happy childhood.

My adult life was plagued by multiple failed relationships, an uncomfortable and self-conscious feeling around others.... In short, I was socially retarded for years.

But because of my inner work I was finally able to mend some fences between myself and my parents before they died.

At about the same time I began my long courtship with a Jesus that did not involve leaving my head and my heart parked at the church door before I entered.

I have come to believe that the only hope we humans have is to start taking Jesus more seriously. He has definitely helped me to connect with a God who loves and forgives me. I can now maintain a good sense of myself and allow myself to feel good about myself and to set some healthy boundaries with others.
 
john w

john w

New member
Hall of Fame
SaulToPaul said:
I wonder if saint john w the great likes himself!
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I live in Texas, and, being the most humblest man in the history of the universe, there is an old Texas saying,...

"When I'm alone, I'm in bad company."

My humility is only exceeded by my extreme carringness.

I'm good enough...I'm smart enough...Gosh darn it-I dig/like me!
 
musterion

musterion

Well-known member
No, I do not like myself. Never have. But that's just as much part of the problem as if I did like myself...I am supposed to count myself for nothing and not think of myself. Christ is meant to be all because He is all in all, Col 3:11, and thinking from there, of others. God (thank God!) sees me in Christ and not in myself. I am to do so, too. I fail mightily, but that's what I strive for.

To think too highly or too lowly of oneself is still to focus on self. Both are wrong.
 
glorydaz

glorydaz

Well-known member
brinny said:
I can relate. Thank you for sharing, sister in Christ and beloved daughter of the Most High God.

I used to literally loathe myself, and with that comes a loathing if you will of others, mostly if they were bullies or mean or detestable. I would take them down.

I didn't realize nor would i listen to what it meant to forgive, etc. and what that unfortunately means, is that i could not/would not forgive myself, which is a terribly caustic poison not only for others, but also for oneself.

It was not until God Himself showed me His Father heart that i began to "see" or grasp His love for me. I just didn't fathom how ANYONE could love me, cuz i hated myself.

God mooooves inexplicably, tho', doesn't He. He DOES complete what He begins in us. And He began a process in me i never thought i'd see. He "won" my heart with His oh sooo gentle proddings and "hugs". He taught me that He has a sense o' humor and i found myself laughing WITH Him at my silliness of being stressed out as i was getting ready for work, thinking i'd be late. It's like He said "stop". And then it's like He said "what are you doing?" And as i paused, i saw how utterly comical i was, and He and i both laughed at His very silly daughter. It was a breakthrough BIG TIME. I had caught a glimpse of our Father's very precious heart towards me.

Fast-forwarding, He moved on to teach me to trust Him in something i preferred not to even think about or consider: "forgiveness". He KNEW i had to embrace it for my OWN healing. But i didn't at the time. He walked me through forgiving those who had hurt me so terribly. And then it happened. Through this process He had enabled me to "like" myself as i left the self-loathing behind. It was after forgiving others that i was able to forgive myself.

That's a profound question, by the way. Thank you for starting this precious thread.

It's like a "healing thread", isn't it?

I really needed this today, because i was feeling distant from God. This thread got me to thinking and remembering how very GOOD our God is.

God bless you sister in Christ and much beloved daughter of the Most High God. May He bless yer socks off (((hug)))
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Great testimony. And this is the true order of real forgiveness. We don't have to forgive others in order to be forgiven. That was the law. We are forgiven when we trust and believe.....only then can we forgive others.....after the love of God has been shed abroad on our hearts. And it's always for our own good and growth....never in order to have our sins forgiven.
 
glorydaz

glorydaz

Well-known member
bybee said:
What about you?
Click to expand...

I didn't like myself when I was growing up. My two sisters and I were raised by my grandparents and people always said I was the "pretty" one with curly hair. I felt horrible because of how that made my sisters feel. I always wanted to be loved for who I was, not what I looked like, and I ended up doing things I thought would please. Needless to say, I did a lot of things that made me feel more guilty than I had before. That all changed when I was saved. I saw myself through the eyes of God and my outer appearance had nothing to do with it. Now a days, I don't really think about whether I like myself or not. Take me or leave me is my motto. :)
 
B

bybee

New member
glorydaz said:
I didn't like myself when I was growing up. My two sisters and I were raised by my grandparents and people always said I was the "pretty" one with curly hair. I felt horrible because of how that made my sisters feel. I always wanted to be loved for who I was, not what I looked like, and I ended up doing things I thought would please. Needless to say, I did a lot of things that made me feel more guilty than I had before. That all changed when I was saved. I saw myself through the eyes of God and my outer appearance had nothing to do with it. Now a days, I don't really think about whether I like myself or not. Take me or leave me is my motto. :)
Click to expand...

We really become our true selves when we begin to see ourselves as our Lord sees us.
 
Word based mystic

Word based mystic

New member
the few times when i did not feel good about myself is when my father would get hyper critical of my interests.
also in high school i was Short. Then i encountered Gods love.

I am in awe of and very impressed with How God made me and how He is working and has worked in me and through me.

Just one bit of understanding of How God passionately and ravenously loves me ignites in me a sense of being loved and thus an ability to love the creation God has made of me.

mark 12:31 sums it up pretty much for me.
AND YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND, AND WITH ALL YOUR STRENGTH.' 31"The second is this, 'YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.' There is no other commandment greater than these.

The love you have for yourself and the appreciation of the Life God gave us, gives us a better platform to love your neighbors.

I like myself.

so there is your honest answer.

When I knowingly do wrong that affects those around me I feel convicted and ashamed. But I get over it quickly as I do my best to make amends.

ephesians 3:16-19 will go a long way to give a base for liking oneself.

that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 may be able to comprehend with all the [a]saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 19 and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God
 
B

bybee

New member
Word based mystic said:
the few times when i did not feel good about myself is when my father would get hyper critical of my interests.
also in high school i was Short. Then i encountered Gods love.

I am in awe of and very impressed with How God made me and how He is working and has worked in me and through me.

Just one bit of understanding of How God passionately and ravenously loves me ignites in me a sense of being loved and thus an ability to love the creation God has made of me.

mark 12:31 sums it up pretty much for me.
AND YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND, AND WITH ALL YOUR STRENGTH.' 31"The second is this, 'YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.' There is no other commandment greater than these.

The love you have for yourself and the appreciation of the Life God gave us, gives us a better platform to love your neighbors.

I like myself.

so there is your honest answer.

When I knowingly do wrong that affects those around me I feel convicted and ashamed. But I get over it quickly as I do my best to make amends.

ephesians 3:16-19 will go a long way to give a base for liking oneself.

that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 may be able to comprehend with all the [a]saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 19 and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God
Click to expand...

Beautiful post! Thank you for sharing!
God's Love is the core of survival for me!
 
john w

john w

New member
Hall of Fame
SaulToPaul said:
A man gets used to a standing date with his gal for cashew fudge every Tuesday night for 3 years, he gets upset when it falls through.
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And I need my Twinkie, and cookie, at mid day, in my lunch box, for my "pick up." Low blood sugar, "ya know." I got that from my mom.
 
john w

john w

New member
Hall of Fame
SaulToPaul said:
A man gets used to a standing date with his gal for cashew fudge every Tuesday night for 3 years, he gets upset when it falls through.
Click to expand...

I don't get upset, Mayor. I'm just high spirited. Nothin' bothers me more, than others calling me "sensitive," or "upset."
 
john w

john w

New member
Hall of Fame
SaulToPaul said:
Sounds like saint john w didn't get his cashew fudge this Tuesday night. :mmph:
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'So deep a friendship hath one man for another that no female caress shall ever tear it asunder.'

Boy, the guy that wrote that must've been some kind of a nut!

I hope that I'm getting through to you, Mayor.
 
Town Heretic

Town Heretic

Out of Order
Hall of Fame
bybee said:
I ask because I have spent a good amount of my time on this earth not liking myself. I was not aware that I did not like myself until I began to question my judgementalism.
I rarely received a compliment from my parents and they were hyper critical of any of my efforts. Trying to please and falling short set a pattern of internal negative thinking.
This is something on which I work to change.

What about you?
Click to expand...
I think it's a tough question...I'd say I don't think much of the original building, but I love what Christ has done with the place.
 
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