Patronizing. Another quality functional adults do not engage in.
You don't seem to understand that adults speak in a large variety of ways, with many words...depending on who they are addressing. When I'm addressing a know-it-all fool, I call him a nitwit so I don't add anything to his delusions of grandeur.
I "don't seem to understand"? Really? How do you know this? You are making an assumption again.
In fact, my communication bedrock is
"The meaning of my message is the response I get. And if I don't get the response I hope for, I need to change what I am doing--not blame the other person for "not getting it."
Parents should raise up their children to criticize others with respect and without calling them names. Just because a person has never learned how, does not mean it is hard to start doing it.
I'm not curious as to your family....you already told me your folks named you James and
programmed you to be of the male persuasion. It seems to have made quite an impact on you. I was raised by normal people the normal old fashioned way, and my kids all turned out great. :thumb:[/QUOTE]Funny. I don't remember saying I was "programmed" at all. This says more about you than it does me. Anyone who was "programmed" was never treated like the human being they were.
Do your children call others names?
Are they cruel and childish?
Did you believe in hitting them?
Are you respectful of their childhood dreams and did you treat them with caring and fairness?
How do they problem-solve interpersonal conflict?
We all tend to treat others the ways we ourselves have been treated. I only hope they won't be passing along your own dysfunction to their own children.