Not really a sorceror

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Real Sorceror

New member
Is too late to introduce myself? I kinda jumped into TOL's religion forum headfirst without knowing the views and temperments of anyone here. I think I know where most of you stand now. If you cant tell yet, I have many beliefs that are completely contrarey to what most Christiens believe to be true, but I still believe in G-d. I also noticed that most of you are solidly right wing.........are there any other lefties?

p.s. Dont burn me at the stake, Im not really a sorceror. No really, Im not. Honest.
 

death2impiety

Maximeee's Husband
Real Sorceror said:
Is too late to introduce myself? I kinda jumped into TOL's religion forum headfirst without knowing the views and temperments of anyone here. I think I know where most of you stand now. If you cant tell yet, I have many beliefs that are completely contrarey to what most Christiens believe to be true, but I still believe in G-d. I also noticed that most of you are solidly right wing.........are there any other lefties?

p.s. Dont burn me at the stake, Im not really a sorceror. No really, Im not. Honest.


Do you believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross paying the penalty for the sin of man and rose from the dead 3 days later?
 

erinmarie

New member
death2impiety said:
Do you believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross paying the penalty for the sin of man and rose from the dead 3 days later?

DID YOU ORDER THE CODE RED???????
 

Lucky

New member
Hall of Fame
Real Sorceror said:
p.s. Dont burn me at the stake, Im not really a sorceror. No really, Im not. Honest.
I might believe you but it doesn't matter now as we can't let all this wood go to waste...
 

Lucky

New member
Hall of Fame
Real Sorceror said:
Whoa, hey now, put that torch and pitchfork down, nice and slow. :(
Fine, partypooper. I guess we can donate the wood to the folks going on the TOL Campout.
 

JoyfulRook

New member
Sir Bedevere: What makes you think she's a witch?
Peasant: Well, she turned me into a newt!
Sir Bedevere: A newt?
Peasant: [meekly after a long pause] ...I got better.
Crowd: [shouts] Burn her anyway!


The Witch: I'm not a witch I'm not a witch!
Sir Bedevere: But you a dressed like one
The Witch: They dressed me up like this!
Crowd: we didn't! We didn't...
The Witch: And this isn't my nose. It's a false one.
Sir Bedevere: [lifts up her false nose] Well...
Peasant 1: Well, we did do the nose.
Sir Bedevere: The nose?
Peasant 1: And the hat, but she is a witch!
Crowd: Yeah Burn her burn her!
Sir Bedevere: Did you dress her up like this?
Peasant 1: No!
Peasant 3, Peasant 2: No!
Peasant 3: No!
Peasant 1: No!
Peasant 3, Peasant 2: No!
Peasant 1: Yes!
Peasant 2: Yes!
Peasant 1: Yeah a Bit
Peasant 3: Maybe A bit!
Peasant 1, Peasant 2: A bit!
Peasant 2: A bit.
Peasant 1: But she has got a wart!
Random Person in the crowd: *cough* *cough*

Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
Peasant 1: Burn them.
Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
Peasant 1: More witches.
Peasant 2: Wood.
Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
Peasant 3: ...because they're made of... wood?
Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond!
Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
Peasant 1: Bread.
Peasant 2: Apples.
Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
Peasant 1: Cider.
Peasant 2: Gravy.
Peasant 3: Cherries.
Peasant 1: Mud.
Peasant 2: Churches.
Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck.
Sir Bedevere: ...Exactly. So, logically...
Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
Sir Bedevere: And therefore...
Peasant 2: ...A witch!
 
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Real Sorceror

New member
Dammit Helm, your just too smart for me! But answer me these questions three before the other side ye see.
What is your name?
What is your quest?
What......is the air speed velocity of an unladden swallow?
 

SUTG

New member
Real Sorceror said:
p.s. Dont burn me at the stake, Im not really a sorceror. No really, Im not. Honest.

This unprovoked denial makes me think that you really are a sorcerer. I mean, how many newbies come on a forum and then immediately post "By the way, in case you were wondering, I'm not a sorceror".

Anyways, welcome. I also disagree with alot of the Christians around here. :chuckle:
 

Real Sorceror

New member
You caught me SUTG, why would I name myself "real sorceror" and then say Im not one. Im lieing either way. Which one, which one? Im a paradox wrapped in an enigma with a colorful candy shell.
 

Aimiel

Well-known member
At least you have enough character to stop calling yourself Christian, when you're obviously not.
 

Huff

BANNED
Banned
Real Sorceror said:
You caught me SUTG, why would I name myself "real sorceror" and then say Im not one. Im lieing either way. Which one, which one? Im a paradox wrapped in an enigma with a colorful candy shell.

So what school of magic are you studying? Arcane? Can you cast Bigby's Assertive Finger? It’s a shame you choose to be a sorcerer as opposed to a wizard. As a sorcerer, you can’t very well enter the World’s Largest Dungeon.

Do you choose to be a sorcerer or is it something you’re born with? All I know please just don’t throw a fireball at me.
 

Real Sorceror

New member
Huff said:
So what school of magic are you studying? Arcane?
Arcane and Evocation of course. Ive picked up a few divine spells
Can you cast Bigby's Assertive Finger?
What? You cant?
It’s a shame you choose to be a sorcerer as opposed to a wizard. As a sorcerer, you can’t very well enter the World’s Largest Dungeon.
I like casting with my hands, not silly wands and books. And really, the WLD isnt a safe place to be, regardless of profession.
Do you choose to be a sorcerer or is it something you’re born with?
I dont know, though I suspect celestial or fiendish descent rather than draconic.
All I know please just don’t throw a fireball at me.
Fireball? On a single target? I preffer Ivan's greater missile storm *menace*
 
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