Dispensation =/= dispensing.
Dispensation (or rather, the Greek "oikonomia", which is where we get our word for "economy" from) literally means "house rules".
Oikos - house
Nomos - law or rules
Dispensing means to distribute or provide.
Actually, funnily enough, that little bit about "law" vs "grace" is a dispensational viewing of scripture, in that it recognizes the the rules changed, from salvation by works (the law) to salvation by grace (faith alone).
One of the things I've noticed myself doing recently is noting the key things that each person I'm in discussion with are saying and comparing it to what others say, and adjusting my arguments to each person's arguments, rather than just have the "us vs them" mentality.
Many times I'll note as I read and respond to posts that are three or more people each discussing a theology that is different than mine and everyone else's.
It's greatly helped me understand the differences between each person's arguments. (Btw, [MENTION=14521]God's Truth[/MENTION], that's another example of "knowing comes before understanding.)
Starting with an overview of the entire Bible helps too...