Helping someone with a sin problem

[shagster01]

Nick's method is a quick way to teach a man to never confess sins or confide in a brother.

 

[intojoy]

There is a person at church and recently he asked me for help with his sin problem. He said that he has been going to strip clubs for several years and has gotten into a lot of debt. He says that he is Christian and that he wants to overcome this problem. I was shocked when he told me this. I have known him for several years and I didn't that he was doing this. I told him that I would like to help him. How would you help him?

He has given satan a beachhead in his life. The reason for the bondage is demonic control.

In the fight against satan we are told to resist him and he will flee.

Resisting by believing what God says about him (strip club dude) and not believing what he thinks about himself.

Particularly that of Romans 8 as well as the promise of performing the work God began in him. If he fails to do this (reckon himself as God sees him) then he has no hope.

Next step is to study scripture that speaks of sexual love in marriage.

The word sex does not appear in the bible.

The word Eros does not appear in the bible.

The word Dohd is the Hebrew equivalent of Eros and is used in the Song of Songs which is Solomon's.

I can help this dude. I was delivered.

 

[intojoy]

The act of sex is never separated from the act of love in scripture.

Adultery, prostitution, etc, these are spoken of in scripture but the word sex is nowhere found in the scriptures.

Religion and modern excesses of pornography have given this man an improper view of sexual love. This is the root cause of the problem. Sex is a blessing of the highest order to be given in the context of marriage. To love my wife includes loving her sexually. The love act should be looked forward to with eager anticipation. No shame no reason to think negatively about it at all.

 

[elohiym]

Religion and modern excesses of pornography have given this man an improper view of sexual love. This is the root cause of the problem.

That would be a point worth discussing with him.

 

[Caledvwlch]

No point in trying to talk to a wall.

Isn't that pretty much all we do here? I can only assume your first name is actually Nick, but beyond that, all I know about you is you seem to like cigars. You're still fairly anonymous.

My parents certainly didn't name me in Welsh. Kinda wish they had, but that's another story for another thread.

 

[zoo22]

Isn't that pretty much all we do here? I can only assume your first name is actually Nick, but beyond that, all I know about you is you seem to like cigars.

Also if his children resist being beaten, he ties them up.

 

[Nick M]

Nick's method is a quick way to teach a man to never confess sins or confide in a brother.

It isn't my method, but I sure agree with it.


1 Timothy 5

20 Those who are sinning rebuke in the presence of all, that the rest also may fear.

 

[Volts]

I'm shocked that you have broken a confidence.

I did not use his name.

 

[Volts]

Point this out to him for starters:

Your walk of faith can be strengthened by daily Scripture study, prayer, fellowship with believers, and regular assembly with others to worship God. Develop this spiritual discipline and it will enable you to resist temptations that may lead you to sinful acts. Whatever God tells you to do, He will equip you to do. When God admonishes you to avoid sexual immorality, He enables you to do it.

1 Thessalonians chapter 4 - Why Avoid Immorality?

You will please God.... v. 1
You will prove that you can take instruction from God.... v. 1
You will respond to the authority of God.... v. 2
You will be in the will of God.... v. 3
God calls you to be holy—literally set apart from the world's thinking....v. 3
God calls you to sexual integrity....v. 3
You will control your own body.... v. 4
God calls you to control your sexual desires....v. 4
God calls you to be holy and honorable....v. 4
You will not display passionate lust.... v. 5
You will not be like the heathen.... v. 5
God condemns your lust....v. 5
You will not wrong another person.... v. 6
You will not take advantage of another.... v. 6
God holds you accountable for your treatment of others....v. 6
God will punish your promiscuity....v. 6
God does not call you to be impure....v. 7
God calls you to live a holy life....v. 7
God sees your involvement in sexual sin as rejection of Him....v. 8

Right now your friend can live by faith—or he can live by his feelings.

AMR

I will tell him all of that. I agree that it is important to develop spiritual discipline. Also, we need the Holy Spirit to help us to overcome sin.

 

[Volts]

First, I would ask him why he goes to strip clubs. You're looking for the deep answer, not, "because that's where the naked women are."

Second, there is no next step until you truly understand what his core problem is--why he goes. Maybe he's shared that with you. I don't know.

He says that he has a large sexual appetite. He knows that it is wrong to go, but he goes anyway. He gets these urges to go and sometimes he just can't help it. He tries to resists the temptation, but he has been unsuccessful. He feels like he is hooked.

 

[Volts]

There is a book called "Every man's battle." I have been told it is helpful to men in the Body. There are many ways to help a man overcome this attack of HaSatan. Upholding him in prayer, providing a helper in the faith that can be called at a moment's notice like AA does. The biggest thing we are called to do first is to love and uphold one another.

That looks like a good book. I'll suggest that book to him.

 

[Truster]

I did not use his name.

It matters not whether you used his name. I'm sure you haven't asked his permission to post his personal behaviour on the WWW.

If you die tonight and the executors of your estate were to access your computer then the person might be found out.

 

[serpentdove]

There is a person at church and recently he asked me for help with his sin problem. He said that he has been going to strip clubs for several years and has gotten into a lot of debt. He says that he is Christian and that he wants to overcome this problem. I was shocked when he told me this. I have known him for several years and I didn't that he was doing this. I told him that I would like to help him. How would you help him?

He should get into a small group for accountability. If he's truly interested in changing, he'll do this. 2 Pe 1:6

Recommended reading:

Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker

 

[serpentdove]

He has given satan a beachhead in his life. The reason for the bondage is demonic control.

In the fight against satan we are told to resist him and he will flee.

Resisting by believing what God says about him (strip club dude) and not believing what he thinks about himself.

Particularly that of Romans 8 as well as the promise of performing the work God began in him. If he fails to do this (reckon himself as God sees him) then he has no hope.

Next step is to study scripture that speaks of sexual love in marriage.

The word sex does not appear in the bible.

The word Eros does not appear in the bible.

The word Dohd is the Hebrew equivalent of Eros and is used in the Song of Songs which is Solomon's.

I can help this dude. I was delivered.

:thumb: Good for you. :king:

He who overcomes shall inherit all things, and I will be his God and he shall be My son. But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death. Re 21:7–8

 

[elohiym]

He says that he has a large sexual appetite. He knows that it is wrong to go, but he goes anyway. He gets these urges to go and sometimes he just can't help it. He tries to resists the temptation, but he has been unsuccessful. He feels like he is hooked.

Is he married? How old is he?

 

[IMJerusha]

He should get into a small group for accountability. If he's truly interested in changing, he'll do this. 2 Pe 1:6

Recommended reading:

Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker

:up:

 

[Nick M]

Isn't that pretty much all we do here?

No. People here do dialogue, and others do not. He is on the extreme fringe of not.

According to him, God created you for dishonor and so he could send you to hell, which is to the pleasure of God. Would you actually care about anything he says?

Of course what he says is 100% refutable with the Bible. He is following traditions of men and made up gods.

 

[resodko]

GIVE HIM A MILLION DOLLARS SO HE CAN SPEND IT ALL ON THOSE FAT WOMEN

:cigar::cigar:each:each:each::noway::noway:

is that what they serve in the strip clubs in Toronto? :freak:

 

[intojoy]

I didn't have an accountability partner and don't need one.

 

[patrick jane]

He says that he has a large sexual appetite. He knows that it is wrong to go, but he goes anyway. He gets these urges to go and sometimes he just can't help it. He tries to resists the temptation, but he has been unsuccessful. He feels like he is hooked.

it likely does have roots in porn. it seems like he is obsessed with visual images and needs to see it in real life. add drugs or alcohol or any number of variables and he can pinpoint the sources and be aware of his thought process. all men have "appetites", that's no excuse - atrol: