Do you consider people to be your friends because they are on 'your friends list' or are people on your friends list because they are your friend?
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I used to have a statement on an account I kept:
I take friendship seriously and am aware of and hold dear the responsibilities of true friendship. Please don't ask me to be your friend unless you also know, understand and enjoy the responsibility and fondness that is found in true friendship.
Perhaps, a little of both? I don't usually place someone on my
friends list unless there's something I have in common with them
or, something I like about that poster. If someone asks me to be
their friend, however, I don't turn them down. Sometimes, it starts
out that, another poster and I don't think kindly of one another but,
for some reason, later we start to like each other.
Kind words coming from somebody you initially didn't like, can
sometimes 'turn around' what you originally thought of them, and
low and behold, you both become friendly towards one another. I've
had that happen several times on TOL. Posters don't have to agree
about everything in order to be friends. In fact, after you become
friends with someone; you can still disagree, and yet, still be friends
with them afterwards. My friends list includes at least one Agnostic
whom I really like, one or more Calvinist's, a Catholic, and a few
other denominations I don't agree with and they don't agree with me.
However, we're still friendly with one another.
You and I, for instance, didn't get along with each other at first but,
now, I call you a friend and have you on my friends list. Just because
posters don't like each other at first, doesn't mean they might end
up being friends later?
